Sunday, April 26, 2009

Self love - By: Laurie McDonald

How important is self love? How does it affect you ability to love and serve others? It was stated to me this morning that one can love and serve others without loving yourself. On the surface that seems correct, many people live their whole lives doing this very thing. Is this really true though? Let's examine this concept. When you are in a state of being in service to others, always loving and giving to others, but never receiving anything back for yourself, you become co-dependent. You never truly achieve joy and peace in your own soul. You live through your service to others. It becomes your identity. You build expectations of those whom you have served. You think, " I have given them so much, and sacrificed so much, they will surely do well and be happy." You judge those whom you have served. When they do not live up to your expectations, then you are disappointed, and unhappy. How does this make the ones you have served feel? Think about your relationship with your parents, how did you feel the last time they were disappointed in you. Did you feel guilty, and bad about yourself? Evetually did you become angry at them for making you feel this way? How did that damage you? So let's get back to ourselves and the assertion that we can be of service to others, without learning to love ourselves. In retrospect, have we really been of service to others? Or did we really end up making others feel bad when they could not live up to our expectations? When we can learn to love ourselves, then we can truly give compassion, and love to others, without expectations of them. Then the people that we serve can also learn to love themselves, and can give unconditional love to others, and so on, in a ripple effect out to the world. The world would eventually learn to love one another, without judgement. Then you can truly be the changes that you wish to see in the world.



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